Flying to the dentist

I am sitting in the airport waiting for the next chapter in the story of my trip to the dentist

- What a crazy thing to do! Flying such a long way just for that!

It was a spontaneous decision after two of my teeth broke in one week; I’ve ignored the jagged edges around big holes in my teeth for a long time now but they make my gums tender and there is an ugly hole in the middle of my front teeth – not to mention all the gaps. I am not in a totally carefree holiday mood, there will be cost, there will be decisions and there might be pain and loss…

To go all the way to Thailand to get my teeth fixed has probably a lot to do with my obsession to get the cheapest deal –no not in town, but in the world!

All the same I buy a cup of airport coffee while crunching nuts out of my backpack and sniffing freshly baked subways for free. I have hours to fill since I took an early flight to Brisbane which was cheaper!

I spot blue paint on one of my toenails while discreetly scratching beige paint of my coat sleeve. I check out the bookshop it isn’t cheep. Finally, in blunt rationality I spend all my heavy coins on one of them fragrant bread rolls which is lovely and spicy. I go and make use of the free shower with paper towel even though I’m not dirty. Then I sit and think and decide to enjoy this trip no matter what! I lean back and feel the comfort of the airport chair and I love my new paper pad and pen and enjoy the worldly mingle and tangle of people.

When we leave Brisbane I see our planes shadow on the sea way below. They give me the wrong dinner as I find out after eating a vegetarians special order of nice fish. We have to keep the blinds shut, not to bother any other passengers. I watch the sunset under a blanket it is fire red, lots of smoke over Indonesia. I look for fire spewing Merapy but am not sure where we are, no on screen flight documentation. It is a smaller Plane I am lucky to have a double seat between window and isle, behind me crew seats. Several lone travelers here in the back all given plenty of space- love it, the movie too, a cartoon, “despicable me”.

I read in the guide book that 80% of dentists in Thailand are female also that it is polite to keep feet low, but book and newspaper high, clothes neat… I am trying. Nice toothpaste and toothbrushes materialize in the bathroom.

I need to rush through the big Bankbook airport and just catch the flight to Chiang Mai. I get a taxi to take me to Mojito house for a midnight fee.. it will be midnight … I decide to leave haggling till tomorrow.. the guest house is in a in a busy narrow lane I am booked in for three nights. My dorm bed has been given to someone else so I get a single room for tonight for 100 bath and a free bottle of water! Lovely!

It’s a small room with a mattress on the floor and has a small window. The bathroom is one floor higher, fitted with toilet and small hand basin, shower head and a sign asking politely “please please please dear guest not put toilet paper into the toilet”. I remember travels in Asia, long ago when tourists wiped their bums with treasured letters, clogged the pluming and then complained about the messy state of the toilets. Here it is clean. A pressure hose is attached to the wall for cleaning! It works a treat, but leaves the bum wet and the toilet as well.

Bionic teeth are better

In the morning I walk and walk and eat bananas they are so cheap that coffee seams extravagant –considering the nutritional value. Coffee 35 bath, excellent noodle soup 20 bath and a large hand of ladyfingers 10 bath.

I also buy a shirt for 50 baths not an overly nice one but hopefully appropriate. People wear their clothes ironed –yes, so do they in oz but there it is my right to be a scruffy misfit, here I ought to fit in.

At 2.30 the dentist’s pick up bus comes for me. She has many Assistants all in nice white coats with nice white teeth.

She clearly wants to implant new teeth into my mouth, there are four gaps. On the x-ray we see that the sinus has dropped where the two missing upper teeth were, so I need it lifted and then a bit of bone grafting… ”where would that bone come from”? I wonder. The dentist pulls out a bag of stuff that looks like a puffy breakfast cereal… artificial bone. The good news, no full anesthetic, only a local one!

On the other hand I could have “removables” again she has samples, they are little pop in, one tooth dentures but they are not very good, she explains, they have to be cleaned after every meal and are less comfortable, but the implants are just like real teeth only better, they cant rot. Full dentures she tells me is not an option I still have 14 good teeth no way she will remove them all and it really is not quite what I wish either.

To lave the gaps empty as they are now, no not good! A model is brought; my remaining teeth are taking over work of missing molars and are getting badly worn on edges not intended for chewing.

I am shown many before and after versions of dental work she has preformed on a screen, for such purpose attached to my chair … oh yes she is an artist no doubt! Can I afford such beauty?

“It won’t take very long” she says, “about 4 visits because we use a lot of acetone” –ACETONE! I don’t like the sound of that… no.., what did she say? –as ees tons –aaha yes I have noticed there are a lot of assistants.

Firstly tomorrow she will fix for me 14500 bath worth of holes! I pay 500 bath for the x-ray and am given an estimate of cost on a bit of paper so I can think. She would also like to crown a bad looking tooth.

The best option, all holes fixed, one crown and 4 implants is hugely expensive!

I juggle figures and - no that is crazy! Only the cheapest will do for me! Got to stick to my style! I am glad to get my teeth fixed though.

The possibilities

The possibilities

On sunglasses you can get cheap deals, double the coolness if you buy two!

Also much else on offer everywhere, tattoos, waxing of face chin shoulders legs especially massages for all body parts and teaching of it. Then there are Thai cooking classes, mahout training trekking, kickboxing, looking at longneck people, rafting, biking and zooming through the jungle on zip lines. This is the activity I’d like to try.

For free are Buddhist meditation and monk chat, might find better value in that then all the other activities and new teeth combined?! After all I am cheapskate!

I lost my single room and am now the sole inhabitant of an 8 bed dorm with adjacent bathroom and balcony nice and spacey.

Down the road, a Greek Thai couple with a cute and funny tiny child provides internet for 10 bath an hour.

fun means tooth in Thai

For breakfast I eat the last overripe bananas from two days ago and a bowl of extra lovely soup, I skip the coffee, saving cost like mad since I am still considering outrageously expensive implants.

I am getting a sun burned nose while waiting for the dentist pickup at the corner, where I had suggested meeting, because their monster bus is a dangerous intrusion down our narrow lane. Finally the girl comes running from the lane to find me. They had waited for me at the guesthouse, but must have remembered…

At the dentist I explain, -“sorry, I will have the cheapest option please,”… this disappoints them all. We settle on a filling rather than a crown for the corner tooth and 4 remoovables instead of implants and no numbing for fixing smaller holes.

The assistants drape a white cloth with mouth hole over my face and snap photos for before and after effects. Many hands are working in my mouth, gently, an extra hole is found and in no time the cloth comes off, I am given a mirror to admire the beautiful job of half my teeth fixed.

I will whiten your teeth now says the dental whitening expert assistant and large things into my moth:”Bite! bite hard now!”... Whitening? Do I want that? Would that cost extra? Is it even good for the teeth? But biting hard makes talking difficult and arguing impossible, they outnumber me intimidatingly.

through the mouth hole

through the mouth hole

My teeth get painted with a foul smelling chemical and nuked with scary blue light. My lips are stretched beyond limits and the biting down hard gives me jaw cramp but I am no wimp and think of all the people who had to endure torture… slowly, a tinge of headache is creeping in…I worry that my teeth might dissolve… when the light finally gets turned off, I am soo glad!---but am told to bite more carefully - while the dentist applies yucky gel to my teeth a second time -!? Nooo surely not! The headache has settled in now, I keep playing the tortured people roll and am ready to give away secrets just when the humming light goes off… ahhhh great!- But we repeat the process, I try to relax but feel nauseas… when In the end my mouth gets free and I walk out the front to pay, I see the coffee machine in the waiting room and I ask for coffee. They don’t like that, - but ok,… we take photo first, and then make sure to have milk with it as well and keep drinking water. the girl makes me a disgustingly sweet coffee … sugar is apparently is no problem for the dentist I can come back next year to get any new holes fixed… many do that, also remember, implants don’t rot!. The bill does not help my headache and makes my head spin did I just pay $300 for whitening of old teeth?! But apparently not white enough yet, no problem, I can do home whitening now and they will get whiter I am assured it is just that they were so very yellow to start with! After every sip of coffee I am reminded to quickly drink water, also that I ought to stop drinking coffee altogether and avoid spices! And definitely use whitening toothpaste as I declined on the home whitening. Possibly best not eat at all? I find some ibuprofen in my bag.

Mosquitoes

Visiting the insect museum cheers me up in spite of also costing a lot. Obviously a weird place! There are masses of huge metal mosquitoes welded all over the fence and strange contraption of bells needs to be rung to get in. From the top of the stairs calls a voice Sawadee kaah! Mr. Manop Rattanarithikul the maker of the bell device and many other things weird and wonderful. As I find out, a man with a passion! Actually, a house full of passions! Only two blinks into the nature festooned hall I think of Penny, she will have to try hard to beat that! This couple has been collecting seriously for 50 years! Oops I forgot to take off my shoes and sneak them quickly back to the door.

Both Rattanarithikuls are hooked on nature but mosquitoes are topping their list of passions. Dr Rampa has discovered 24 species herself and has written a pile of books about them. They have traveled all over the globe collecting and researching, but, - ah- Australia! You can’t take anything out! - well-In Thailand it is all protected too now even rocks – not that they mind…

Insects, fossils, paintings, plaques of philosophies on God and nature, good advice and information are filling the two story house. Each painting contains a large Mosquito somewhere. They are skillfully done by Mr Manop and a friend. There are hundreds of mossie specimens on display, sadly, too small for my eyes to appreciate the differences and be seduced by their charms. The story of the Rattanarithikul’s is displayed throughout the place and it is fascinating. Mr Manop was interested in mosquitoes ever since he nearly died of Malaria at the age of 9, when he also found god (the Christian one it seams). At 18 he got a job as research assistant with a foreign university studying carriers of malaria.

To put my shoes back on I need to put hands full of pamphlets somewhere, I put them on the floor…. Dr Rampa picks them up an holds them for me, I remember - no printed matter on the lowly floor… sorry!

http://www.earthtimes.org/articles/news/359082,chiang-mais-insect-museum.html

amazing crawlies

amazing crawlies

Buddha smiles show no teeth

Next morning I set out to find the Cultural Center and the Museum, I walk north for a long time. The sun shines from a grey sky, there are faint mountains in the distance, I assume due to pollution I won’t get sunburned..? A cluster of green energy shops stand along the road among electrical and mechanical businesses.

solarshops

solarshops

I walk past two guys in all in black suits and shirts who are climbing into a black SUV, they spot me and ask “where are you from?” I tell them and wonder if they know how to get to the Cultural Center. I am following their directions a hundred meters down the road when they pull up and offer to drop me there; it is close, and closed! But the important young men in black take me all the way to the Museum. I thank them, so nice of them it is to help me! They tell me they are police; I had guessed something like that.

The museum has displays of local geology and some ancient dugout things among them a skeleton whose teeth had collapsed in a semi circle into its necklace. Neck and skull are mostly gone only the teeth… it makes me wonder what people in the distant future will conclude of the remains of my teeth… implants would tell an intriguing tale the metal pin would leave a hole…, can plastic fossilize - (fossil to fossil..) to be found in 400 000 years? Removables would pop out when the flesh rots, and not stay in line.

The section of the museum I like best are the many Buddhas with all their different smiles, sublime, smirky, blissed out, aloof, even seductive…!

buddhasmiles

buddhasmiles

Have to get moving now not to miss the dentists pick up, I had my coffee fix!

The dentist fills more holes, some are huge, I get jabs into lower jaws, micro surgery, an almost microscopic cut with a knife to get a bit lower into the gum to drill out a hole that descends, but no pulling out -no- I need that one for biting I am told, - suits me fine to keep it. The dentist is a busy woman and often has to do a bit of talking on the phone while fixing holes – I don’t see it, my head is under the cloth. Then I get a load full of gunk pressed first to the top jaw and another one into the bottom, to take a cast for my funky removables…..

I have to wait for the ride back to town since there will be another cousomer to deliver, a man from Mareeba who made his money for classy dental repair from gold digging. He goes around Australia with his mobilom a fair bit – a what? You know, a liidle house on wheels –ahhhh! He has a strong accent after 40 years in Aus! I hope mine is not that bad…?! When I get to asking if he knows my son who works for a French in Mareeba, we have arrived at my stop and need to hop out quick- traffic is coming!

hotair grid

hotair grid

I go to check out the huge every-night-bazaar along “Mueang Chiang Mai” and buy nice elephant cards when I get fed up with millions touristy items I walk back. Thai music vibrates from speakers and girls come dancing through the beglittered Tapae gate in traditional sways doing pretty finger ballet and smiles. Millions of people snap millions of pictures, hot air balloons get sold and lit and everybody snaps millions of photos of that.

I am getting hungry and go to find a street cart where I buy 50 cents worth of wonderful noodle soup with tofu. Since the streets are still lively I go to check my email.

dragonds

dragonds

doi suthep

A pair of unforgettable dragons snaking down the stairs at Wat Doi Suthep, remind me, that I was there a long time ago. Lots of people worship with great devotion, light candles and incense, focus inwardly or on divine, mysterious places. I buy 10 bath worth of candles, lotus bud and incense, and make up my own deal to fix that wrong wish I made on the ringing stone. I bargain hard, one flower 3 incense sticks and 2 candles for 3 wishes - the spiritual angle I cover by making them not for my self.

doi suthep pic

doi suthep pic

A new day eases in, Gong music hovers in the hazy air and golden pagoda bits poke out from among the roofs. People seam to look after their own needs before work (not everybody’s luck I guess) I get company in the dorm.

The pressure handle on toilet hose is broken and the water turns off several times a day. You have to make sure the large bucket under the tap is full and the bailer handy, before sitting down.

Wats often provide nice toilets to the public free of charge, sometimes showers too, a great support to physical and spiritual wellbeing of fellow people !

Unfortunately squatting toilets are less common now in touristy areas, covering the rim of the western ones with toilet paper is out. The high squat is tricky… Tai chi might improve it.


Electrical wires wind like jungle vines along the roads in thick tangles.

I follow them around and through the hot city for a few hours acquiring a fine layer of pollution. The electronics center screams from across the moat; a big modern complex with booming speakers, a huge display screen on the outside features pop singers. Police in snazzy black uniforms stand guard? They look cool in spite of the heat ... must be the sunnies!

Inside oho! It’s so very flash and cool in all senses of the word and more noisy than side street alley all possible sounds are displayed! Everybody looks fresh and rich and so very clean except for me... I look the best I can manage. The focus here are huge TV screens there are also laptops, cameras and white goods. I am in vain looking for an extra memory card for my camera or a small flash drive. But find a screen with 3D glasses to try out, in front of comfy cool seat - yes there is an effect there but I might wait for a more evolved model.

pluggedin

pluggedin

Across the river Ping I find good soup cheap. From down stream enormous trees beckon. A narrow, walled lane leads to one that majestically over looms it and the river, from behind the wall golden roofs shine. The alley is littered with building debris and rubbish, including a temple tile which goes into my bag. The inside of the temple is heavily decorated with detailed paintings of daily life in old Chiang Mai. Taking photos inside temples it is usually allowed if you lower yourself, at times it feels intrusive, so I don’t, but want to. On the way back I see a large turquoise dragon- a real life one!

ping

ping

Ohh! something‘s up at Tapae gate. The space is set out with red and blue chairs, the stage too, in red and blue. A large pink heart is projected center stage, a picture show on a smaller screen to the side, might be political?? There are lantern-shaped display stands featuring the king in younger years…. I take a seat, a game host sparkles on to the stage and speaks into the microphone “ m- makap, mm- makap” a lot of that, apparently it means “isn’t it” … A singer gets us to stand up and sing - to the King probably (I hear the word “Raj”)…? –quite lovely! Then I notice –praise the Lord! The English version on the small screen – ahaa! A Christian gathering-promo ….clever clever… tricky!

I try not to wake 3 bodies in the dorm and walk way west out of town to Wat U Mong. Finally a sign “Wat U- Mong you are here”. But no wat - how wide is here?! Further on an arrow points to “nature trail” even better! I follow the road up through the bush and think I am doing the nature trail, till an arrow on a map points to a narrow dirt track beyond. Up and up the hill I go… till I see golden gables as you do hereabouts…I cross a waterfall till the track fizzles out. Behind me a young couple are jumping among the rocks as if they knew the place, the guy turns out to be Ausy, they are very friendly and direct me. I walk on till electrical wires, jungle vines and track are all entangled and no longer that attractive. Time to turn, plants along the track look like cinnamon trees and the bark tastes like it too, a flowering Yam smells just like ours, an other looks like Smilax only the leafs are larger and there is a lot of bamboo. Smooth rocks along the thundering waterfall offer a seat with a view. Beautiful butterflies won’t sit still. Several people pass, enjoying nature some carefully look into the water; they take photos of ferns and little things, a teenage boy strokes moss. No ants come to eat the crumbs I dropped.

On the way home I visit Wat Suan Duak, I buy medicine from the drug and amulet stall - “rub” for all aches and pains 3 jars for the price of two and a half… (yeah well even I get sucked in now and then), and a bottle magic fluid that will work wonders” when your thought not very good” (translates a headache- I think…) the man also sells phallic key rings - very large for a key ring – very small for a penis, I don’t buy any of those.

Lots of kids in school uniforms dash about on motorbikes, 3 fit on a bike ok, though it is weekend. Are they doing extra lessons? Signs everywhere advertise English classes. The uni district too is teeming with young people. But on a building site a couple of kids are taking it easy, health and safety regulations seem relaxed. People toss buckets of soapy water onto glossy tiled footpaths which serve as business or factory space, or the other way round. No baby seats on motor bikes, cute little heads are looking out over the handle bars. Some parents wear helmets (maybe you can’t get them for babies)…. Dogs too get around on motorbikes too, backseat or lap. They don’t have mobile phones though, at times when you want to ask, for instance where Wat U-Mong might be, you just can’t find anybody who isn’t talking on the phone; a lot of market hustling opportunities are missed due to phone calls. Vendors on soup carts talk as they stir, Tuk tuk drivers chat while reclining in the back seat, and girls walking down the street appear to have giggly conversations all to themselves, no different than anywhere else, but more visible like most daily activities . People don’t seam as poor as in the past, I am told that most the beggars, there aren't many, are refugees, since other needy people are usually cared for by families. You see the odd fat kid here too…. But most people are slim and fit and do more physical work than in Aus, just walking down the footpath and avoiding obstacles requires lifting of legs and a bit of balance.

bike

bike

walking street

I am sitting next to a garden sprinkler in the shade, a good enough reason for visiting the zoo. There are some tourists here but mainly Thai families, it isn’t crowded and a pleasant surprise as far as zoos go, the animals are in relatively large enclosures. The zoo is spread through beautiful greenery over the base of Doi Suthep. Enclosed birds though are always a sad sight; I’d love to see Toucans in the wild! Never heard of a Binturong before, it resembles a large sloth but apparently belongs to the cat-/civet family.

As it is getting late, I catch a songthaew back to town and step out into the hugest market I’ve ever seen- and I am hungry! Hope it won’t vanish while I go for a shower, dump my sweaty clothes in the bucket turn on the shower o joy!….dribble dribble… I soap up liberally – drip stop.- wet clothes back on, grab items wet and dry and check if downstairs shower is working ….Yess! When I get back up all taps are gushing wildly, I’m just in time to stop a serious flood.

The only thing I needed to worry about was that I mightn’t find a space for my feet, Or that I might want to stop and shop while the crowd keeps moving. The walking street market is humongous! It crosses the entire walled city, spreads into side streets, plazas and Wats, and it’s packed! There is a left hand traffic situation with stalls and musicians on the median strip- no overtaking lane! I just admire, will buy presents later, now only food! – Oh so yummy! A selection of two bath sweets stuffed with beans, sweet potato and yam; a satay stick full of origamied leaf parcels containing flavourous herbs; black sesame seed pancake, many things fishy and noodely, many things mysterious! The marketers remind me much of the ones at home only even more resource full and industrious. Food vendors are doing brisk trade though the competition is enormous. I wonder what or if they pay for stall sites? There are clothes and bags of all colors, paintings and carvings, zoomy, glowy things to throw into the sky. Or you can sit to have feet massaged, apart from that it is just a huge walking, buying, eating party.

popins

We agreed for me to meet the dentist pickup at the same spot as last time, I wait and wait and wait … then go and find a phone, I insert a few coins and dial- nothing! When I give up, to my delight the coins rattle out. Another phone does the same – maybe not enough coins? I buy fruit to get more change and try again, - no luck. At the guest house I ask Boom to use the phone he reluctantly pulls his mobile out of his pocket and asks where to…I see that it is the only one - ah no nonnono! Ahhm- just how do I use the phone at the 7-11, just the way you would!, only one bath though. The third phone works! - “Yes we are running a bit late, we are on our way now”

There in the waiting room sits the French from Mareeba waiting for his drop off ride he tells me they were waiting for me at some guest house of which I’ve never heard…mmm? Ah well… I’m here I go in.

After a bit more grinding and fixing, the dentist clicks 4 plastic teeth into the gaps in my mouth. They are tiny dentures really, but discreetly called “removables” I am supposed to remove and clean them after every snack and at night I am to put them into a disgusting flesh pink denture box. – Fat chance I will have that sitting next to my bed in a dorm full of kids! These teeth will have to learn to live in my mouth! I don’t tell this to the dentist. We do another photo shoot of my mouth. It is tricky to know which tooth goes where so the dentist engraves them with LR, LL, UR, UL. I thank her for the nice lettering and that she used English alphabet, we all have a laugh and that’s it, if I have trouble call or send an email… it will take a bit of time to get used to them – I guess it will, they are disgusting and make my mouth dry and leave no space for my tongue! – I will use email.

monk chat

To distract my tongue form fiddling with the pop-in teeth I walk to Wat Suan duak for “monk chat”… The guide book says, monk chat sessions explain visitors about Buddhism and give monks an opportunity to talk English. When I get there I follow the signs, a young monk greets me and offers me a seat at a table.

He asks me if I know why he is wearing his robe, no, I don’t. To show respect to the Buddha, he explains serious, even young features serene, very handsome, clear skin wide eyes, 28 years old non smoking or drinking. He has been a monk for 11 years and a novice before; he is of the Arak, a minority people from Burma near the Bangladeshi border. His English is good but I am not used to the accent. He speaks little Thai and doesn’t often need to; only came here recently to study English. He asks me if I meditate. I answer, in the past but not now. Why not? “– Well it takes me so long to still my thoughts…” “Don’t fight them let them flow” he says, do you like meditation? –“…well yes ahm… ah…” He has loads of natural authority and I feel like the immature one…he advises I need a teacher… though yes, Buddha says a book can be your teacher. If you don’t like someone’s teaching, don’t accept it. You have to practice meditation regularly, use something to lead up to it like walking; walking is good” –well yes I do that…” It’s not necessary to study Buddhism, meditation it is good for you whatever your teaching is. It is good for relaxing and health and very good for the memory some old Zen masters remember 6000 texts of Buddha’s teachings. It is enough to start with 5 min a day, for instance before sleeping” (---ok, I’m sold –I don’t say it, but I am)

What do I think Buddhism is about? I remember the fat book on Zen I read as teenager because I liked the boy who lent it to me, I concluded, interesting may be for my old age, first I want to enjoy worldly pleasures.- I sort of tell him that. He says it is good to reach a state where you can accept anything that happens however bad it is. We talk about Aung San Suu Kyi, whom we both admire! He loves her. “Is her sacrifice helping? … Yes… he thinks …he hopes… may be... if you give so much you need to get something in return… they just had elections- ahrrh!- Nothing changed, the minorities suffer, they have very basic and simple necessities it isn’t that, he beliefs in a life free of consumerism, but they are not free they are suppressed. The rulers make huge money of natural gas that gets pumped from Arakan to China, and with the money they buy weapons to fight their own people. The ties of the Arak to Bangladesh go back to ancient times, they are better to his people then Burma, even host freedom fighters. I am surprised as I thought of Bangladeshis as Muslims while his people are clearly Buddhist. Yes Of a very strict order, he says, not like in Thailand where he finds things lax and over commercialized.. “What ought the world do to help?” I ask. "Not the world,” he sighs ”India and China ought to speak out against the Burmese leadership on behalf of freedom and human rights, Thailand has done so.” "China?!” I ask. He nods “Yes Tibet….I know…”

He uses internet and phone and even watches some TV, though monks are not even supposed to listen to music, many people are critical about them doing modern things, but in to-days world you have to, otherwise you can not know what is going on. But he believes the internet should not be abused, which brings him to ask what I think of old big guys coming to Chiang May to get Thai girls …. A topical topic…-“mmm hm ah - I don’t really like it but am barely sure why --- though it can be good too, it can work… I know people … how can we know if they are happy or how happy they would be otherwise….?” I answer hesitatingly- “. In Burma people are very much more modest and pious, may be in the west morals are very loose?” He has heard it is very materialistic… but appreciates its generosity. I say, yes but there are many lifestyles in the west, in free prosperous countries you have choices, not all choose to acquire endlessly. - He can not possibly see my picture from what I tell him… He has concerns on the subject of the big guy and young Thai girls “Consumerism and loose morals are not good for the soul, these girls sometimes rip the guy off, they might have a Thai boyfriend, and the big guy doesn’t know, he doesn’t understand Thai… its not good!” Mm yes, no, I agree and try “if they are similar ages it can work...”. “But those girls loose their culture...” He feels it is good to live in the straight and narrow lane of a culture… people tow the line… I say, that it can be a bad thing too, concerning your self all the time with what other people think is right or wrong. He agrees, but sets about to explain the 5 precepts of Buddhism…. No sexual misconduct or over indulgence, not to destroy life, not to take what is not intended for you, no incorrect speech including lies and not to intoxicate including smoking ---- “excuse me” --- his phone rings. He keeps the conversation short and excuses himself “my family, it is their only way to hear what is happening in Burma.” I say good bye now, it is late and I have a long way to walk back. I thank him, feeling privileged for the glimpse into a very different life. I intend to pay more attention to politics… something I have meant to do for years.

On the way home I focus on my teeth again and badly want to spit the whole bunch of fakes out of my mouth into the gutter or even the moat.

spitouts

spitouts

dream

As I intend to move on in the morning I go and see Boom about the bill he gives me 10% discount, so it comes to 810 bath( about $27) for 9 nights! Who wants five star luxury?


load my on my back and think of my dream as I walk. I find no bus stop where the guide book sends me, but the tourist info. “About 10 kilometers to the terminal you need a tuck tuck”, they tell me. Traffic runs the wrong way here, I go to the next intersection… then another where a large, mainly, banana market is setting up. I wonder what they use those stem sections for that I see piled high. It’s crowded, lots of chaos, they haul Produce about in huge metal crates welded to sack trolleys, what a good idea! - Whoa! A man on a pushbike gets between a truck and a front end loader- I suck in breath for a scream – though only his basket gets mangled.

A songthaew takes me the rest of the way to avoid any more sideways dis-and-attractions. A comfortable bus seat offers views of bamboo hills, banana patches, orchid farms, mango and lychee trees and lush sweet corn and rice paddy’s.

My removables are so spitoutable! … actually hurt a bit and a tooth still has a jagged edge, it is too far back in the jaw to work on.

chiang rai

First thing at Chiang Rai station -coffee! - Town center can’t be far according to the guide book. I walk and walk and walk…a long way, the road is a building site it is hot and fresh hot bitumen is not leaving much room for me to walk. But there is an end to it, a market on the other side of the road is a welcome sight. From its corner ooze spicy fragrances out of many pots of interesting concoctions. I ask for an orange colored one with green bits and chunks of fish. The teenager who serves me speaks good English and tells me, the bus stop has shifted out of town a few months ago. He wonders where I’m from, - “from the north of Australia! It must be cold there; does your city have snow?” “No, bananas, sugarcane and heat!” “Oh –oh - in the north? – ahh!… yes yes he knows!” “mmmm! I love my food! It’s Tom Yum Baa Buk he tells me. – Only two more k’s to town.

Down a lane across a ditch a sign points to “The Garden House”. A man comes out of the gate “yes! Yes! Sawadee kaah! Are you looking for guest house?” “yes yes! Sawadee kaap!” 130 bath for a beautiful room of polished dark red wood in an old high set house! I have come up in the world! Shower and toilet are downstairs, through a lush garden with hammocks and seats. The man Sam brings a roll of toilet paper, a towel and a bar of soap, but his wife is cranky. I love this room so much, I visit the Chinese festival that is happening around the corner just to buy water and food. I enjoy the nice music that is blurting from huge speakers in my room while I gobble steam buns, filled with black sesame and red bean paste.


accomm

accomm

hilltm

The hill-tribe museum in Chiang Rai is interesting though it is a big story, to explain it all, it would take books; -they are hanging page by page on the walls, next to all sorts of bamboo gadgets and intricately woven cloth. There is nice shop there too and a free cup of tea. At the tourist info I ask about “natural focus trekking” but all “trekks” lead to temples, longneck people and handicraft villages. In the end I decide to go up river to Ta Ton by long tail boat, it seams, upstream is only way you can go form Chiang Rai.

My back tooth nags me. I came here to get all my teeth fixed and I won’t like to pay Australian prizes in a couple of months to have it out…. and those damn removables! I need to see the dentist before leaving Thailand.

taton

taton

river

There are only six other passengers waiting to get on board all others young, a French couple, a Portuguese- and a Polish couple. The boat slips up the river Kok through bamboo hills, some covered in wild forests others and orchards including banana patches. We stop at the village, where the French and Portuguese get off to go trekking. All are encouraged to explore the shore and go and spend the money. A massive VERY long obese python is for hire to be draped over shoulders for photos. Lots of those on the wall to prove it has snuggled up to celebrity, royalty any rich and famous from far and wide. It is so smooth and shiny I wonder if it is a water snake, there are other photogenic snakes waiting for money, one is white and yellow. The boat sleeks around patches of rock that stick out of the water and avoids the half submerged bushes, bedangled with plastic bags instead of leafs. The debris -line on the shore also consists of plastic items, so much brighter than sticks!

I think there ought to be an international festival, a sort of “tourists-help-clean-up-the-world-day” though, - same old problem, once all the garbage is collected where will we put it? And – oops I add my piece of garbage in the river! As I lean back, my glasses plunk of my head backwards into the water! The Pole snaps millions of pictures through an ultra long lens. Poland is another great place to get dental work done dirt cheap, he tells me and asks for the exact cost here, I think he would like to say “aha! In Poland you pay half that much….” But no, “ahh that is very cheap…” he says. His interest is in view of tourism to his country, he is way too young to have anything but a tiny hole to fix - I’m sure.

At Tha Ton boat landing I slurp tasty noodles with tofu, and chat with a nice young Dutch who enjoys his noodles with tofu at the next table. He tells me that there are buses all the way back to Chiang Mai, He came that way and is going by boat– The tourist info man in Chiang Rai told me he didn’t know if there were buses…? I think he is more in the business of booking the flashy kind of trip.

Down the river lane a busy little round woman offers me a room for 110 bath. It is lovely, two types of the greenest of the green linos adorn the floor, one has red roses the other yellow patterns. The walls are skyblue, with darker blue along the bottom. The red orange bed is made up with sheets of blue with green flowers. The two blankets are striped with all colors, more florals on curtains and pillow and a slightly grubby foot mat adds still more shades. A whirring little fan dries my one dollar shirt that I have worn almost every other day for 4years, traveling, bushwalking, to the dentist and to work. You can’t get a better buy even in Thailand.

Searching for the white Buddha who looms over the village, I find a rainbow colored snake squashed on the road. Several Buddhas live on that hill looking over the junction, of two misty fertile valleys. One is golden and encircled by many neck-flaring cobras sporting little beards; looking like Hindu-ancient-Egyptian-Thai fusion.

kok

kok

to chiang dao

For dinner, Thai pancake from a food cart near the bridge, the man slices a banana into a little dish and whisks in egg. from under a moist cloth, He pulls a small lump of dough and stretches it flat, pours oil on a hot plate and smears the dough thinner, places banana and egg in the center, dollops this with ghee and parcels it into the pastry, flips it onto more oil, slices it into a styro box, dollops more ghee and lavishly besprinkles it all with sugar. It tastes sweet and oily and fried.

All food gets in the way of the removables or the other way round! They hurt my gums they squash my tongue which flips them in and out…in and out. I am down to wearing 3, I feel they increase plaque in my mouth, and worry they fall out when I laugh. I talked to a man with only one black tooth; he had a great smile…. It is an option…

I catch the early morning songthaew to Fang where it is still too early for food, unless you’re a monk, who gets up at 3am for meditation; in that case it is about time to walk the streets with food bowls. Shops have provision loaded silver trays ready, in return the monks chant over the kneeling benefactors, may be good luck wishes… At the bus station a monk is sitting down having a smoke then he buys sweets from a stall, he tosses the money in among the goods. The woman digs it out and places his change on a cling wrapped sandwich, according to the guide book that is the proper way for transaction between monk and woman, though it suggests the ground for it.

While waiting for the bus to Chiang Dao, bus station men teach me how to greet in the northern way “sawadee chraap” Ch very swissly pronounced we all get good laughs out of that!

The road winds through stunning hilly landscape, studded with soaring, decaying mountain teeth all holy, unlike mine, sprouting greens.

In Chang Dao I find a sign pointing to guesthouses and to a large chunk of mountain with its head in the cloud. 7 k’s to Malee’s guesthouse which is the one that appeals to me since “Lonely Planet” calls it a “nature lover’s guest house”.

Doi Chiang Dao and the enormous trees surrounding it have seduced me with their beauty. I want to stay, so I pay more than usually, over $ 10 a night for a simple room, bathroom down the garden track. The sign-in book wants to know my occupation; above me are biologists, engineers, and teachers. I write PCA and hope no one will know what that is – I am not ashamed of what I do but it shows little education … I prefer not to be judged before first sight.

Many steps through tall forest lead to a monastery and a cave temple. It was founded by a hermit who went off bushwalking for the dry seasons, all through the wild hills – I bet he knew all the best spots! A golden roofed temple soars over the canopy with steps leading to it. It offers swooping views over trees, birds and hills to far away mountains. I feel more than meets the eye, calm – eternity…part of me floats… When I turn around to look into the temple I see a nun meditating – I am awed, did I feel her calm? If it is possible, imagine the possibilities!

Walking back I enjoy the greenery and scenery and stop to eat a red papaya from my pack — suddenly I chew a tooth! Yuck rrrh! A removable between my teeth nooo! nooo I don’t like that no! Not at all!

Another Wat Further downhill has caves which harbor magical treasure apparently not yet found to this day …perhaps of an unmaterialistic kind? A track winds through hanging and jutting Stalactites and -mites bejeweled with Buddhas and shrines, the electrical light creates habitat for ferns. On the cave entrance crystal clear pools teem with huge pet fish of many varieties.

The guesthouse has an old style atmosphere, at dinner time everyone comes to the dining room which is a raised bamboo gazebo, people greet each other. In hope of some info I join in and order a Thai salad which is lovely though leaves me still a bit hungry. Malee has a Swiss husband and a ittle boy, they are into bushwalking. I hear you can join the CM hiking club for outings every Sunday they meet near the Chiang mai zoo and are planning a camp on top of Doi Chang Dao, I wish I could delay my departure by two weeks! Husband and brother-in-law know the place well and recommend hiking routes, though some require a GPS as they are overgrown and unused. Ok, Thai jungle, here I come! In my room I eat most of tomorrows hiking ration…

walk in the jungle

It is drizzly when I set off up the road. I follow the nature trail, then through the fence of the Wat into the thick tall jungle. The fence line sports 6 strands of wire? –why is it here? There is no gate on road to the monastery. At home a 5 strand fence is a good one, will this keep out tigers and elephants—Massive bamboo, mysteriously draped in mist, looking oriental! Under foot glow red orange ginger flowers, under the mulch red orange soil, very sticky! Large leaves glisten and grow as I watch, plants scramble, crawl and wind up into the faraway shrouded treetops. Gingers hide flowers I’ve never seen before, golden webs encircle same yellow knee spiders as ours, ants are no larger than in oz, I look out for tigers, cobras, monkeys hornbills and Binturong, —CRACK— CRASH! No elephant but dead bamboo! I also see dead canes with fruit hanging, I thought bamboo dies after flowering, all members of one species at the same time, but thick young canes sprout out of dead clumps, they don’t look like seedlings? Here and there I leave the fence line to check out amazing trees and rocky outcrops, in one of them I find a limestone cave, a hermit might have stayed here, a couple of broken Buddhas sit on stalagmite ledges an old beer bottle on the ground. I am getting hungry…usually I have a snack in my pack! The descent is very steep and skiddy, I see two beautiful butterflies and so many mozies that it is hard to take a photo without blurry flecks. Insects are the only animals in sight, not even scats or tracks of anything else.

chiangdaojungle

chiangdaojungle

At the lodge Malee invites all guests to come to the village where Loi Kertong celebrations are in progress this is the first I hear of the festival though have noticed a fair bit of drinking happening down near the caves. I walk there with a Swedish-English couple who teach in Chiang Mai. They have taught all over South-East-Asia most of their lives. Loud music blurts from enormous speakers! Crackers and fire works explode left, right — under our feet… we jump and dodge. Sparkly lights come aglow as daylight fades. — There come the floats … oh so colorful and loud! On the back of cars sit pretty young girls smiling and waving out of bright plastic boats, giant lotus, neon lights and fluro colours while the music throbs from mighty speakers in trailers, and a beer drinking village follows each float. The last one has no speaker, so they sing. All rival for us few spectators to gain in numbers, we join in, swaying behind but not drunk enough to last so we find the Malee’s mob where the stage and food stalls are! She has been asked to judge floats, 4villages are in competition, I imagine it is hard to find unbiased judges… we end up being judges too, on slips of paper we are to write 1,2, 3 or 4 depending on which float we liked best, same for the decorated gates we passed on the way,1,2,3,or 4. It is time to eat! Noodles and banana leaf wrapped sweets! The noodles come in a styro takeaway box, when it’s empty I feel the music vibrating from it. Malle directs me to her friend, a food stall lady who is eager to collect my box, which I happily donate to recycling. I find out Chang beer is the cheapest and good enough, guest-judges jell-chat through the music. During the walk back I get invited travel back to Chiang Mai with new friends around midday. In the morning I talk with Swiss guesthouse hubby, he retired fully two years back, when he moved to Thailand to live full time with his wife and little son who is 7now. Malee has been running the guest house for 15 years. There are photos of them all in Switzerland, in the snow and at the Rhine fall. They appear a very happy family and the best about them is the bright funny child who clearly loves his life and his parents. … I ought to tell the monk about them, so I have a piece of wisdom too.

loikvillage

loikvillage

herbs

At the cave Wat large natural pharmacy stalls sell roots, bark, sticks, seeds, flowers and leaves, for all purposes, labeled with intriguing English translations. A pretty young girl in a wheelchair convinces me, to buy the herb that promises to get rid of my wrinkles, I wonder if I manage to get the capsule version through custom. The girl presents me with a little stick “for chewing” – she mimes, “its good for sore throat” explain her fingers... I chew - -ahh I know that flavor well! It is liquorice-wood!

herbpics

herbpics

I walk up the nature trail to the other Wat where I eat my lunch under a gazebo. A couple of bushwalker types pop out of the bush, looking for the nature trail. They turn out to be are very friendly Canadians who are having a great time, hitch hiking all over Thailand and Cambodia for several months, they offer useful info and I offer insect repellent. They would be nice mates to keep! I am amazed and delighted to hear that John is 80, Janet only 68… when I show them the overgrown entrance to the trail he helps her down the steep embankment.

The women at the Lodge make Kertongs for Loi Kertong festival in honor of the water goddess I believe. I’ve seen banana stem discs for sale for a while and wondered if they would cook up nicely in a Thai way? But no, they form the floating base of the Kertong. Nails are used to attach intricately folded leaves and flowers, in the center goes a candle and incense. Nails must be cheap here – should I buy a few kilos to take home?

kandm

Tina is sitting in the back of their car; both prefer it that way as she is prone to comment on Fred’s driving. The trouble is not his driving but I find it difficult too not to point out cars and bikes that pull speedily into the traffic stream from unexpected angles! I am glad not to be the driver same as Tina, who not only shares my name and age, we also were here a long tome a go in the same year and traveled through Asia about the same time. I gain much local knowledge and hear about Thai schools which focus on learning by heart and flashy uniforms more than thinking says Tina. They tell me where to join a Tai Chi group and we agree to meet there tomorrow evening. – Oh, here is my street! Goodbye! I hop out quick, this is where I saw a cheap room. But it is full like the rest of town, due to Loi Kartong, which happens during the nights of the full moon in November – now! The Sunday night market is setting up while I walk from guesthouse to guesthouse, with a temple tile in my backpack… all over town to find a room. In the end I am pleased to pay 200 bath for a foul smelling cell with no air hole. I shower and hurry to join the throng, and am so hungry - hungry – night market — here I come! Yum yum yum …

food

food

Massive floats are squeezing down the packed market street trailed by gigantic pulsating speakers. Beautiful people do graceful or ridiculous things, among glamorous drapes and props. The floats are labeled in Thai, they appear to be sponsored by clubs and organizations – may be businesses? On one of them rides a monk is he advertising monkhood? I am watching through the gateway of a Wat which is filled with foodstalls, there are worse places to be trapped in-. When I look for a place to chuck food wrapping I am directed to a set of bins and crates where meticulous garbage sorting is expected! –check that out Mackay! With difficulty I manage to squash along with the crowd. The sky is full of hot air balloons and fireworks and smoke and music and explosions and generator stench... closer to the river there are few stalls and more space, floats stop for performance of dances and music. People carry kertongs, more and more hot air balloons dot the sky like a mass of little red stars. The river and shores are aglitter with thousands of beautiful kertongs.

bigloik

bigloik

On the way home I send a message to dentist, I would be willing to spend $ 3000 more on my teeth if I could get rid of those damn removables! That last wisdom tooth which it is bound to be trouble and no use for biting.

I sleep well enough in my stinky hole but in the morning see a sign on a steam bun wagon “room for rent”. “150” the man writes on his newspaper edge, I nod; he tucks his money-biscuit tin under his arm, and motions me to come have a look. He hadn’t planed on enquiries before his wife is back home, and flusters off to get a neighbor to help with English. The room is large with polished wood floor, has a window and cloths rack and a nice kitten blanket.

An email from Tina lets me know Tai Chi is off during Loi Kertong, but to meet at the 7/11. On the way I check out Wat Ket Karem, an oasis! Wats often are public friendly places with toilets, showers, plants, seats and quiet. This one has a museum as well. There is a Chinese angle to it, here is china town. Everything is dusty, old and ancient things mixed together, teapots from throughout time, fossils, fabrics, phones, electronics and lots of photos. http://www.thailandtraveltours.com/news/16-chiang-mai-museum-wat-ket-karam.htm

Luckily Tina marked the 7/11 on my tourist map the other day… follow the first road to the left across from the back of the wat, … it winds and turns and zigzags… there are no grid like intersections just mazelike angles, a woman sits beside a door, I say 7/11 with questioning tone and gesture. She points and we smile. When I get to a big road I ask again, finally I find a 7/11, am still in time, but think I walked too far. When I get bored with waiting, I retrace my steps and find Loi Kertong is still going strong so I join the snap happy crowd for pictures of ever grandioser floats which must have cost heaps of baths! I snap and snack. Sushi is my pick of the evening 5 bath a piece you get a tray and a pair of tongues to choose a selection, they are very good! I buy a bag so I can wash my smelly backpack, then get persuaded to buy a second bag as a present. Long sections of footpath are set up with bright plastic recliners, foot or leg masseurs sit at their base, busy kneading away. A great way to get a front row seat to the show on the street, my feet are way too dirty! When I get back late, the bun people’s residence is shut, as I try to lift the roller door Mrs. Bun comes to my help …has she waited up just to let me in?... I am sorry, specially since I intend to move tomorrow. We say friendly goodbyes in the morning; the man reads his paper at the corner near his wagon he insists in giving me a bun for no pay! Sweet or pork? I chose sweet it is delicious! The new room costs 100 bath a night and has a shower and toilet, I haven’t seen it yet. It is occupied till midday, but I can leave my pack.

Morning traffic stench of the eastern moat roads is overpowering the aroma of my coffee. Where will I clean my teeth before the dentist? And what will I get them to do? I churn my options, over and over. I am sure the removables I was shown as examples were thin walled and flexible, unlike mine.

The dentist listens to my complaints and concerns and calls for the assistant with calculator and notepad ….. Implants! Yes that makes her smile in an “oho-Now-we-are-ready-to–deal” sort of way! She offers a huge discount! But says my plan of having just one implant is no good, both opposite teeth must be implants— which doubles the cost…— my internal calculator stagers among far-off figures while another cast is taken to replace the falloutable and a few uncomfortable bumps get ground off. I voice my concerns that a build up of bacteria under the popins might rot my real teeth; she recommends wearing them just a few hours a day, for chewing.

As agreed, I send an email a couple of hours later, confirming to spend $ 4100 on two implants, one bone graft, a sinus lift, one tooth extraction and a few months after another $2000 for capping the implants. ———10 minutes later I cancel it all except the extraction of a way back in the check-hard–to–fix tooth. — I feel better! After all, only the cheapest deal will do for me!

ideas

ideas

taichi

At Wat Kat I wait in the shade to see how it all goes. Chinese music is playing and people are milling about, watering the garden, socializing…they gradually group and start to taichi. I find a spot behind the very back and copy. More people drift in, They slot into spaces till I am no longer out of sight and as I try to retreat a woman shoves me back into my place.

I get my legs badly muddled and realize I am not good at imitating the forms but love feeling of doing these flowing movements in such a beautiful garden next to a glittery Thai temple together with people who have tai chi in their bones. There are 2 other westerners, a tall woman and Fred has arrived too, he is gangly, a hyperactive drama teacher. Another man is tall but has Asian features. In the past I used to feel tall in Asia but nowadays I fit among average even though these people are about my age. I try to copy the most graceful person, which is difficult when heads ought to turn to the side, bend down or the whole body turns all the way round. When we finish, the woman who noticed me copying her comes over and orders me to step like that and put my feet there and here and do such with my hands and this with the other …we are both not happy with my performance but hope tomorrow will be better. I meet the western woman who is Swiss and 62, looking 52, she has retired here.

Before going for diner at Tina and Fred’s we stop at the market to get groceries. They are both very welcoming, a bit overworked, both very skinny, Fred, as on speed, Tina, as on Valium! Tina shows me the house, which looks like an Asian craft museum! Neighbor Lois from Aus joins us for diner. All of them were teachers in New Guinea in the 70’s. Lois retired and visited her son who was teaching here, got the idea of doing the same. Now a few years later she has a new man, a new job and a new life which she totally loves. Outside under a tree we eat deliciously cooked fresh veggies with rice followed by Lois’s excellent apple crumble, washed down with beer. How nice to have a bunch of new mates! Cats and dogs play and lye about. I walk home through the night streets for 2 or 3 k’s. I feel perfectly safe, there is so much life in the streets.

As I enter the guest house the TV flings different colors over the couple in bed on the table. Upstairs in my room I switch on the tely too and am surprised that it works! I flick through dozens of channels in many languages, while I sew sleeves into my shirt. Sleeveless shirts are ok in most places, not in wats, I’m not sure when and where else, so I wear them all the time. I hear that several hundred people have died when a bridge collapsed under the weight of a large crowd during Loi Kertong celebrations in Phnom peng. I watch fox news–a huge drama about a jawbone that is not of the missing person they previously thought and they repeat with dramatic emphasis! Al Jazeera is more informative and less dumb…- watch out America! - I love my new room and sleep well.

I wait to have breakfast at the Freebird café, it opens 9.30, a café- eating-, meeting-, learning place and second hand shop all in one, profit goes to Burmese refugees. They ask for tourists to teach their skills… I wonder what I know that they don’t, while I watch young people sharing knowledge. It is way the nicest place I’ve had coffee at, no stench, nice garden nice music.

That evening after Tai chi, I get extra coaching again from the woman with the ponytail. Another friendly lady comes over and we chat, I am of the beaten tourist trail.

None of my new mates are there so I go to check my email and find food, finally click through the multitudes of channels on my TV. There is a Thai channel with distant tuition of obviously complicated maths, a meditation guidance show, in which concentric pulsating Buddhas and soaring gong clangs are guiding you higher. From Korea a bizarre gaming broadcast in which two guys “sports commentate” in snooker style, an elf war, in American: Ahh! Nice move there by Fov -----thinks about it,--- backs off---- going for the tree of life again---- as you can see the gargoyles strike!....

A monk introduces the strangest show, all I understand is “Heidi”, there is a song about “Heidi” and a cartoon of a girl bouncing trough flower meadows, explains that it is the Swiss Heidi he is talking about. Pictures of little Thai girls swathed in white, meditating, follow. Then Heidi again singing over the rainbow…and more girls meditating… among cartoon hearts and little ponies - I see that I haven’t got the faintest about the meaning things spiritual. Nirvana, heaven and bliss is likely to be worlds apart for every one of us… but couldn’t have guessed that Thai monks might believe it is Heidi-land for little girls… but he might be right…

Down the road from my place I check out the tattoo shop’s portfolio, the young artist comes out to say hallo, I don’t want a tattoo I tell him, just like the designs, he insists I sit down and shows me photos of his proudest work, it must take for ever! “Ah about 3 hours this one, - no that one about 3 days”. On his arm he has a picture of his village in the north east, he says, he will always be homesick for it … but makes a good living out of tattooing he lived of painting previously but this is better. He loves having all the tourists here.

I get to the tai chi early, Tina dashes by on her way to massage and asks me to join them later for dinner at the Indian restaurant, just ask any body for Hinlay’s , it’s just over there!…ookkkkkay yes I ought to find that…? A man picks up stray leafs from the exercise area, everybody sawadees. I am the most unco temple dancer in Thailand! But I am determined to learn, my dyslectic brain finds it hard to copy the moves let alone remember a whole hour of them. I find it especially difficult if hands and feet are in action. At the end my personal coach takes me aside again for one-on-one tuition.

I remember we came through an illuminated parking lot – not this one, - not the other, try a different lane! - Maybe the other? Yes there was a pack of dogs here- or have they moved? – Lanes twist and turn, am I lost? - I am lost! I ask for the well known Indian restaurant, two people don’t know it the next one sends me to an Indian bar. From there I get directed first left then right, another clue sends me to the base of the high rise and then opposite, but you have to follow right around…. so I do in a wide sweeping curve, where the lanes take me. And to my great surprise and delight I find them still there! With lovely curry we have interesting conversation in discrete whispers about the people who run this place and serve my food. The are actual real life descendants of “the king and I-”whow!” I whisper in amazement! Also the old guy who runs the museum at Wat Kat is a direct descendant but ..hush-hush… “The King and I” are banned in Thailand as it is a royal disgrace that the King had a western woman (Thai concubines no problem) – I nod and shake and wow and tz tz tz, wondering if times have changed or if it is a matter of different rules for different folks. On the other hand, the king apparently had great regards for the west; in Thailand they still largely eat with spoon and fork due to the king’s decree, the previous one’s I think... Once long ago he was presented by a British envoy with cutlery, apparently he had it laid out at breakfast and saw his visitor use a spoon and a fork, which made the King decide that all his people should do this from now on. Also woman were encouraged to grow their hair as it seamed to be done in the west at the time. Apart from gossiping about the olden days Tina and Lois decided to come along on the Zippline special for which I had booked in the morning. And I hear tomorrow it is international buy-nothing-day. Back in my room I watch a bit more telly which I hardly ever do at home so, again am amazed by what I see, British teenagers go off to work in 3rd world sweatshops which gives them dramatic breakdowns and changes them forever, for the best. So I wonder if any enterprising Thai will pick up the idea and offer to tourist “sweatshop experience for One day 800 bath two day 1200 bath” hm it might be a possibility for Australia too…

dogs

The dogs have a barking festival in the street below my room all night long. When I walk to Tapae gate to join early tai chi, they are sprawled all over the road having their turn at sleeping while traffic roars by, they don’t to get run over – not while I am watching. Dog paradise is in Chiang Mai. There comes Aasta around the corner …she had a sex change -! The dogs are well fed and enjoy total freedom. Unless they are tiny and fluffy in which case they get dressed up nicely and wrapped in bunny rugs.

dog grid

dog grid

It is still dark when Tai chi starts, I slink in at the back. This group has two leaders facing the group; we copy them, not in mirror style but do as left and right does – all I can hope for, is to untangle myself in the end. The sun rises and tourists arrive and watch… J ! I run off to the dentist…

to have my back tooth out. A jab on either side of it and she pulls and needs to cut a little and yanks some more and here it is! The dentist pops it into a small zip lock bag for me to take home! She mends the micro surgery with one stitch, I need to come back to get it out on the morning before I leave. I am also given, –in exchange for money, a bag full of painkillers and antibiotics, though nothing hurts. I have two more painkillers later but am not taking the antibiotics. My ugly tooth in the bag goes into the first bin.

My friends rock up at boom travel in zip-line-adventure-tour style, Lois in half long jeans and Tina in jungle green with collector pockets. Both wear pretty sandals, as always I hope for a Dunlop volley day…

First we visit an orchid and butterfly farm. No one, could not like those exotic petals and wings! - Though I love them best in the wild, in spite of less flamboyant size or color. Next stop, bamboo rafting! 6 of us sit on a raft while the guide poles us, gently down the stream through pretty scenery… a great venue for serious chatting, but not exhilarating. We disembark below the Elephant-stop which is a high set hut on a steep slope. Elephants are parked around it; the mahout on the neck motions us to step on and move to the outer edges of the seat I share with a Peruvian girl. Our elephant has a 5 month old baby girl who is keeping close; it is very cute with long wisps of hair. Going down steep slippery gullies is scary if you’re on the outer sire of the seat, but we see that the elephant is sure footed, her track is no wider than a cattle -or people track. The elephant is made to obey, if necessary with a hooked stick it looks rough, we just have fallen besotted with our elephant, the girl from Peru is shocked… though I wonder,— they do have a thick skin …? Probably you have to be assertive with such a big animal… it is quite inconvenient if a dog walks all over you, with horses you have to be firm we found out… Is it cruel to keep elephants domesticated, or would it be a pity if skill and knowledge that goes with it was lost? Is there enough room in Thailand for leaving the number that now bring in tourist dollars as wild? There is a fair bit of campaigning against elephant riding –I don’t think we are too heavy for them, are they treated well? Apparently breaking in a youngster involves dominating them… I know there is more ways than one to break in a horse… may be this goes for elephants too??? Mainly I see people here treat animals kindly – are tourists squeamish and citified and don’t know about keeping elephants? It seams the elephants have not such a bad life and their owners appear to love them. They provide income after all and how could anybody afford to keep an elephant otherwise …though how can I hope to get the full story without speaking Thai! After lunch we 3 oldies get sent off, to the zip lines. We get fitted with a harness, a helmet and a mystery stick each. We follow the guide up hill and up a ladder onto a platform around a tree (Dunlop volleys beat sandals). We join up with another group of young travelers who are being hooked onto the cable one by one and sent flying. From the next platform the third guide yells BREAK before people slam into it. The stick has a notch that fits over the cable and this is how you break the guide explains. One last problem, the sandals will surely fly on their own…the guide lends his shoes to Tina and Lois one each while he slips into sandals and sticks the other pair in his pocket and Whooooho, scary to step of the platform at first —then… zip zoom such fun to fly from tree to tree! Sometimes we get hooked onto the back of the harness, now you go superman style! The guides joke, and have fun showing off their tricks! from time to time we abseil to a lower platform and the guides get great laughs out of jerking the line while we go down, they want to hear people scream — it is more fun that way they say. The final flight is across the river, back down to the ground superman style with outstretched arms. Doing tricks and scream is compulsory! This is definitely the funest part of the adventure tour. On the way home we stop at a village where the ones who didn’t go zip lining get to visit long neck people. We wander over to Tiger Kingdom to have coffee on the viewing verandah. We watch how the paying visitors pat the tigers and snuggle up to them even. Someone suggests the tigers might be a bit sedated, but they are still playful the carers tease them with palm fronds and the tigers pounce in and out of a pool after it. Lois knows someone who’s wife actually got snapped by one in this very park. As the husband couldn’t find a keeper to help he had to punch the tiger on the nose repeatedly to get it to release his wife. They had no first aid kit at the park and he had a hard time to find a tuk tuk ride to hospital. This park is apparently the other critical local animal rights issue though the tigers are breading successfully and the park supplies zoos around the world with tiger cubs. We walk back to the bus and browse the stalls there for souvenirs. On the way home we talk with the Chilean and Spanish girls, we all agree that we feel safe in

this country even walking just about anywhere any time of the night till Lois says “yeah but remember how that woman got shot as she was leaving your masseuses house Tina?” “-yes, but that was by her husband’s hired assassin” - Thailand has the second highest murder rate in the world after Ecuador, it is very cheap to have someone killed here they tell us. Apparently most drivers keep a gun under the seat - why? On the other hand people will leave their motorbikes parked along busy roads with helmets and other items in the basket on the front… though Lois had he house robbed…. But then again, people are nice…. but there is a lot of wife bashing going on…. life is cheap here…. But good… may be better for some than others? Is it changing, now that families are smaller and more prosperous? People are amazed that I have 4 kids, they have one or two.

zipline

zipline

My coffee cames with sweet-salty biscuits – an acquired taste…the 3-D table cloth makes me belief I am looking down into a village on the Lago Maggiore on the other side of the table is Paris, This here is a classy place. I set out very early and walked as fast as I could out to the arboretum to meet up with the CM hiking club, but did not find them, since I was looking forward to this walk I am intent on having at least as good a day on my own. Maybe visit the queen’s palace, where the botanical gardens are; it is Sunday I can’t find public transport to it. 16 km out and then back along an ugly road probably would rival the hiking club’s excursion, but not in a fun way. So I go and send a birthday email and try to find more fun, which turns out to be tai chi in the evening I notice the various styles of expressing the same moves. The woman do pretty things with their fingers, Thai-dance-style-like; the men mainly, more forceful. All exercise concentrated and sincere like in prayer. one part sounds like the anthem, the moves to it seam in praise, we do them with devotion and dedication, I hope it is to someone nice.- probably the king I don’t know him… but guess the thing that matters is that we feel greatness exists. After the session this time every body pays 20 bath fee for the whole month.

taichi

taichi

I stop at the bee shop to buy the smoker I had my eyes on as I am leaving soon now. At the Tapae gate I walk into a big crowd, – it’s the condom show, free condoms for all –! What I need is food, a million snacks wait for my hungry belly at the walking street market! One stall offers a large range of crunchy insects; a teenage girl asks me are you going to try? “Yes, which are the nicest? “This one” she points to the bamboo grubs, its very nice you should try, two bags are being filled, I pull out my money but the girl has paid for both, “no no” she insists,”I buy for you! From Thailand!” And she and her friends have disappeared into the crowd – how totally generous is that! I crunch into the lovely pale lightly salted grubs—mmmm!

In the morning early I head for the southern moat road to catch a bus to Doi Inthanon, my day pack filled to the brim with overnight gear, hiking gear and snacks. When I pass the food market I feel, its coffee time, a bar with seats surround the buzzing coffee woman. I ask for hot coffee no sugar, she is fast, -teaspoon of coffee powder from a drum, dash of condensed milk from a row of ready opened cans, hot water from the urn - hey presto! The coffee is sweet and cheep. Stallholders come with large coolers and get them filled with ice coffee. She packs them with ice and ladles in strong liquid brew, ready made from a bucket, then lavishly bedrizles it all with condensed milk.

The bus to Chom Tong leaves in 10 minutes! As soon as we’re out of the thick of Chiang Mai traffic the driver hits the gas! Pep peep! Past motorbikes full of mums with school kids, past chugging along food vendors, fast fast! I see just the thing blitz by, cross cut root systems of trees turned into furniture, I snap a blur. My tongue has learned to click the upper left removable in and out and in and out and does it all the time … I want to spit my false teeth out into the gutter where they would add a touch of interest, that is where I would like to see them and even snap a photo and have a laugh – about the old weirdo who spat or lost them there… the bus driver does with his finger ring the same as what I do with my tooth – on and off on and off – is he wishing to chuck it into the gutter too, is it his wedding ring? He has very high cheekbones- that’s all I see of him above his head hangs a kitchen clock. Now the ticket woman makes him slam the break and ushers me out, she vigorously sends me across the road to wait for another bus, - it seams- which surprisingly arrives in 10 minutes!

Chom Thong is a country place with people in traditional dress, it takes me a while to figure out how far away from Doi Inthanon I am, and that it costs 1800 bath to get there by Sweng Thau, at minimum 1100 they say, which is about 15 times as much as both buses to here combined …for 15 times less distance! But it’s too far to walk, I figure, after setting off through garbage along the dusty busy road. Also I wonder if I would find a bed, by nightfall, so I look for a bus back to Chiang Mai. In the evening I book an organized tour to Doi Inthanon and back for 900 bath, including lunch. Unfortunately not a national park hiking excursion- that is not on offer.

At tai chi an ant gets into my clothes and runs all over me nibbling her and there while I try to do things right. A girl in white loose clothes with a lotus between her palms walks around the pagoda round and round. Women are not allowed to go up onto it.

At a street stall with urns of fragrant teas I chose the one the man who sells them can’t believe I want, he is sure I want the white one, which makes me not at all want to change my mind. He ladles it in to a plastic bag and ties it with a rubber band but gives me no straw. I bite a small hole into a corner to taste it - so sharp and spicy! … It hurts the hole in my gums I will try later - I knot it tight.

The girl at the bus booking agent shakes her head when a monk with a begging bowl arrives, he moves on. I wonder what the rules and customs are. Will monks ask at the same places every morning? Can several arrive at the same house?

The minibus arrives half full and we pick up a couple more couples along the way. The guide introduces himself to us and us to each other. A Belgian couple and an Iranian couple, A Britt a Thai NZ couple, a Malay Chinese couple, a Thai English couple and me. The guide Mr. Beer tells us everything about Thailand and the king and he really cares that we remember and pay attention but the bus is noisy and even faster than the blue bus and I sit in the very back while he speaks from the very front…I get the camera ready for the rooty woodwork place wooosh here they come –blurrrr--- gone! Chiang Mai is 741 years old; King Mengrai founded it and named it Chiang Mai it means New City. ….. We will visit royal projects. It was the queen’s idea for the hill tribe people to grow cotton and weave cloth- of the traditional type. Hilltribe people, white Karen, long neck Karen, and Karen. …. We will visit water fall, one, two, very big waterfall very slippery and Stupa, one, two, 1. for our king, 2. for our queen and garden and top of the mountain. We are asked the height and name of the highest mountain in our own country! -And now we get to have free time till we get to the waterfall, even sleep if we like. The old New Zealander with his Thai girl next to me are obviously in love, lots of hand holding and snuggling and running hands along body parts, she even plays with his lips and ears. I fail to see his charm or beauty though, he is very tall, I notice when we climb out of the bus at the waterfall and I get to see everybody from the front. We are allowed 30 min free time, but have to make sure we use the restroom and also be very careful! I meet Ramona from Antwerp and her hubby, she is warm and friendly and he is funny and charming. But I have to make the best of my 30 min bushwalking time; a stony track climbs to the top of the magnificent waterfall which sprouts rainbows. Up high there are several ancient stone picnic tables but no people. The track leads on, I follow a short while and whish I could do this for the rest of the day, the trees are tall and mossy …. I descend and chat with the Iranian woman from Melbourne who is also very nice they own a food and spice shop and this is their break before the xms rush. Mr. Beer rounds us up and makes sure we all had been to the Hong nam.

Village of white Karen now: white for unmarried women, dress one piece, married women two piece, color. Once she is divorced can not get married again. Men can. Unmarried man red shirt, married men red shirt! Karen come from Burma, they are good and quiet and good to the land, no slash and burn and no opium. Now the King and Queen encourage to grow coffee and tobacco! We hear all this standing in the middle of the village in the shade of a high set bamboo house. I feel not entirely welcome and embarrassed about intruding, the inhabitants are away or indoors except for three old people who are winding cotton on weaving implements. They reluctantly nod a tiny hallo. The man from Melbourne appreciates the effort of the people but says that this is the dirtiest place he has ever seen; I almost blurt out “oh you ought to see our place!” Mr. Beer guides us to the weaving and selling room, several people buy hand woven shawls. Two women sit on a platform and weave, they receive payment and give change, but there is not a word of sales pitch, apparently that is the Karen’s way. The girlfriend of the Kiwi can’t decide between two scarves, he buys her both, she is delighted!

At the queen’s falls a platform juts out of the steep jungle, we watch the waterfall thundering from great height – very beautiful! And the queen has actually been here once. My waterfalls are less spectacular, surprise me in the midst of no where and offer a swim after a long walk! I am told not to touch the fungi, it’s poisonous. Linda from KL introduces herself she is smart and interesting, she and her husband are the only ones older than me.

We are let loose at market stalls beside the road, they offer dried fruit in all colors of the rainbow –a shade too bright I think but the samples are delicious. I buy a bag full of irresistibly displayed persimmons; the change of 5 bath comes as a stack of one bath pieces sticky taped into a pile.

Lunch time! A large table is set out for us and lots of lovely food arrives. I sit next to the Thai nurse from Bangkok, the Iranian diagonally opposite is very jovial, he loves Thai food, and would try everything he sees but his wife always wants to eat in a fancy restaurant. He rubs his belly and rolls his eyes... ”oh- but Iranian food…!” They have it all in their shop, Jasmin gives me a business card to come and have a look! I mention that I have been to Iran - Ah but in the Shah era! Sigh! --- It is a pity the way it is! It might get better again? – Sigh! – We hope! After being herded to toilet we’re on our way to the top of Doi Inthanon highest mountain in Thailand. – First a talk “we all walk together; we watch stupas there and environment… ok!” A boardwalk leads us into the jungle 10 steps on Mr. Beer stops and lectures about the king’s plan with the environment. And a few meters further the same again I very discreetly sidle off –…. He calls me back to come and listen: a stupa is in honor of a human, animal or such, a pagoda on the other hand is in honor of Buddha, people can’t go into pagoda or chedy. On the downhill I sneak back to have a look at what takes my fancy and doing the loop in the opposite direction I manage to appear just as Mr. Beer is calling my name … ah here I was all along… but I might have missed a vital piece of info. The big view is obscured by clouds. We visit the kings and queens pagodas, built in the 70’s no expense was spared. I talk with Jesse and her agricultural advisor husband, he knows plants! As I’ve left my bag in the bus, Jesse lends me 10 bath to chuck into the pond to make a wish, she insists, it matters, this time I am prepared to make the right kind of wish!

On the two hour drive home we are questioned about what of our lessons we remember.

doi int

doi int

So many places are called sabai, clothes sabai, motorbike sabei, sabei food, fun sabei –fun means tooth! I thought sabai might mean shop but no, it means Happy!

I have tried to find a book on Tai Chi, but books here are warped in cellophane so you can’t browse and know what you buy. My personal Tai chi instructor comes over after the session and seams to invite me for Sunday …sorry I leave tomorrow! I explain with regret- “go back home- ahh haaha… next year! Come here to exercise every year when you come to Thailand!” “Yes thank you very much! I will certainly love to come and do that if I come back to Thailand!”

I walk over to Tina’s where I meet their friend Bina who is an American-IndianfromIndia. Lois drives us to the Art Center to watch a play, called “the Pilgrimage,” directed by Fred, preformed by his students. It is about conflict and rift in a family, about war and a possible peace in the end. They are a clever bunch of kids who memorized their long lines perfectly, it all comes of well.

Afterwards we feel its time to eat. There is that place out the back … someone suggests. Just a short walk behind the Art Center we come to an interesting curved building quite beautiful, specially inside, all roundish, windows smoothed into walls, with a sandy finish and Japanesey trimmings. I silently worry about the cost. The food is nice and plenty of it, tea means a whole pot though I spill half! Bina speaks fluent Thai; it took her 3 days to learn the alphabet - thought she might be smart…Not many foreigners learn the language well, they tend to work around English speakers and Thais are usually keen to learn English. A quarter of the bill amounts to four dollars. On the way home I get dropped off at the night bazaar where we all say goodbye and promise future visits. I buy a last present.

The day to pack my bag has come; it might weigh more than 21 kilos…? I decide to leave the temple tile behind as I don’t manage to knock the cement off the back without tools or damage to bathroom floor. I park the pack at the reception till tonight and go to roam town one last time. On the way to check my email a van pulls up next to me, it is the dentist van – an hour early! How did he know I was going to be found along here? At the dentist they tell me I’m early and offer internet use upstairs while I wait. There is a reply from the quarantine office about papaya seeds – I am allowed to bring some if they are perfectly dry, carefully sealed and labeled…. too late now ….

The dentist pulls out the stitch but doesn’t want to hear about the click-in-click-out tooth… implants is her spatiality! “Removables“were never mentioned for any other reason but to illustrate how hopeless the options to implants are …. richer clients are desirable…

Walking back I meet the French from nth Qld, he is on his way to a date with a 26 year old Thai girl –after all, he is a man with brand new implants! “Yes, its very nice” he says laughing,” but I will have to watch the money, last night cost a lot, all the family and friends to pay for, I can’t do it all the time!” He has a hangover too from only 3 beers, normally he doesn’t drink! Now he is a bit early, and I am looking for a toilet so we go for coffee. His dental work is still under construction; all up it will cost him $16000.00! “Ah” he says, throwing his hands open “when I was young they called me Françoise of the white teeth...” He has some savings and the pension, and an unexpected inheritance and a bit of money he made from gold digging! “Oh I bet the dentist would love to hear you pay for those teeth with gold you find lying about in Australia!” I say. ”Oh yes! She right away got me to help her find a metal detector on the internet!” And they browsed away together for the longest time, he thought surely there must be people waiting, and then they found out about a huge nugget someone found in Thailand! He shows me photos of his room, a modern large place with lovely view from lovely balcony very much nicer than mine for just a little more cost but quite a long way from the center and for 6 months duration. He pays for my coffee khob koon kap! Next one is on me I say.

I get my bags and sawadee kah and- kap my hosts and walk in direction airport with still 100 bath in my pocket a tuck tuck pulls up and I agree to pay 50 bath for the ride. It turns out to be a long way across complicated busy intersections which would have been hell to cross on foot. It is a wild and speedy ride, the driver is pleased with the 50 bath and I am glad to be early and have time for a much needed cleanup. I eat the pawpaw I earlier bought – seeds and all- and make sure to stow my pocket knife in the large pack, not in the handluggage.

My flight is called! I am on my way with a mouthful of less than perfect teeth, but no holes, with new friends, 4gigs of photos and new experiences, new skills and new habits (have been meditating everyday since talking to the monk) also a backpack full of materialistic presents as it will be xms in a few days!

Swadee kaah(p)!


Almost a year later …..

Last week, a piece cracked off a bottom canine, of one of my best teeth it was up to that point. -a killing tooth, I think that is its proper job, not grinding, The dentist had warned me, to wear the removables for eating or I’d bust the teeth which were not intended for chewing.

I admit, I rarely wear the removables, except one of them for cosmetic reasons, sort of like an ear ring. When I drive home, I kick off my shoes and remove the removable with a sigh of freedom and pleasure. I kept it in the change dish below the ashtray, till one trip to town it wasn’t there! I looked and groped and dug under seats, feeling more attachment to that tooth than I expected (in a detached sort of way) – finally I lifted up the carpet and there it was among dirt, and I wondered how it could have got there, but pleased to be able to spark up my smile for the day. In a hurry by now, I blew off dust, and popped it in, - yuck! A rough and hairy sensation, jagged edges! I stopped, put on my glasses and examined it ….there were little gnawing lines all over! – A mouse had started to eat my tooth! Disgusting vandal! I put the tooth in the chewing gum box under the seat and smiled less brightly. After work I got out my pocket knife and did some carving and sculpting on it, not bad at all, now it has a bit more form to it, a handcrafted look. I keep it in a peanut butter jar together with chewing gum so it gets the minty taste and the empty wrappers disguise the disgusting look.

I am planning to wear the other pop-ins to protect my good teeth, - soon.

I am reluctant though, to get the broken tooth fixed by the local dentist; I can’t really expect a fair deal after abandoning him for the Thai dentist. So I’m browsing the net for another great dental deal in a wonderful exotic location.

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